Do you try to get prayer ‘right’ but often feel like you’re failing? Ever wish you could get help from an expert, just like you would if your car started playing up?
Nuns and monks spend years learning to weave a rhythm of prayer into daily life. Over that time, they gain some amazing insights into everything from dealing with discouragement to recognising God’s voice and finding peace in his presence. Once you’d have needed to make a special journey to a monastery to benefit from this wisdom. But now technology means the voices of nuns and monks can be heard far outside the cloister by so many more of us.
‘The world of men and women has forgotten the joys of silence, the peace of solitude, which is necessary, to some extent, for the fullness of human living. You cannot be happy for long unless you are in contact with the springs of spiritual life which are hidden in the depths of your own soul.’– Thomas Merton (Trappist monk at the Abbey of Our Lady of Gethsemani)
We wanted to capture wisdom like this from nuns and monks across a number of different Christian denominations. So we created the 14-Day Prayer Challenge, a unique course designed to help people learn directly from nuns and monks and then put that learning into practice through a daily guided prayer time. Right at the start, we invited the Discovering Prayer online community to tell us the questions you’d like to put to nuns and monks. Then I went to see them, asking their advice on areas like:
Their answers might surprise you.
One of the most powerful takeaways was the nuns and monks’ openness about their struggles with difficulties like low mood, feeling far from God or finding it hard to focus. Another was their view of prayer as a lifelong journey of learning rather than a practice to perfect.
Learning is at the heart of everything we do at Discovering Prayer. We want to learn together in an active, joyful discovery of the treasure God has for us as a community in prayer. As an organisation, we’re always looking for the best, most evidence-based ways to help you flourish in your walk with God. We’re also keen to develop best practice in researching what we do and teaching those in the church who want to learn more about fostering prayer in their communities.
In this article you can discover what we learned from the experts through the 14-Day Prayer Challenge in these four areas:
(Related: Download the full report on the 14-Day Prayer Challenge)
First up, we asked what questions you’d like to put to the experts – nuns and monks from Anglican, Methodist, Orthodox and Catholic traditions. The response was revealing. It’s clear many of you want to go deeper in prayer, but have a tough time grappling with challenges like:
When I went to interview the nuns and monks I was moved by their honest and compassionate understanding of these difficulties. Over the years, they had enjoyed profound experiences of God’s presence. But they were also familiar with long, dry seasons of discouragement. Their acceptance of this and practical suggestions for finding a way through were life-giving. One Challenge participant described the ‘great liberating sense of permission to struggle’ this gave her.
So what did the nuns and monks say about prayer? Here are four insights:
(Related: Listening to God and Stilling Our Wandering Mind)
Over the course of the Challenge, nuns and monks shared a number of tips which are easy to remember and simple to put into practice. They may even be transformational, like they were for one participant, Caroline, who wrote to say:
‘I’m so happy participating in the 14-Day Prayer Challenge – it is just what I needed having felt “lost” and rudderless and going through big changes in my life. Learning about how to get closer to God by using prayer as a channel for deeper connection and exploring new ways of praying is a priceless gift.’
Here are seven tips for you to try:
(Related: 7 Ways to Learn to Pray Without Ceasing)
My inbox is testament to the difference taking part in a prayer course can make to your wellbeing and relationship with God. So many of you write to tell me that praying with Discovering Prayer has helped you to focus better, or be more present for your family, or find peace even when life is hard.
Research carried out during the 14-Day Prayer Challenge indicates that a prayer course can make a difference to your life in these three ways:
a) Greater personal flourishing – people who took part in the Challenge and gave feedback reported improvements in:
b) Deeper communion with God – people said the course helped them feel closer to God and more secure in their relationship with him, and that it improved:
The reminder that God is eternally present and that there’s no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ way to pray also released some into a much greater sense of security and comfort with God.
c) Improved wellbeing in other areas of life. New ways of accepting themselves and feeling content with the uncertainty of life helped respondents find fresh patience and presence for those around them. People shared that the gentle approach of the nuns and monks helped them feel a greater sense of peace. This in turn translated into improved relations with family and friends.
One Challenge participant, Barbara, wrote:
‘Each day, I feel as though I am entering into a holy place, like a chapel where the door has been purposefully left open, for me to enter in. It feels wonderfully personal (just for me) but also like his big open arms welcoming me into a beautiful sense of the community of God. It feels heaven-sent and connecting with such precious, deep roots of faith is just what I have needed. I have tears in my eyes as I write, as only Jesus knows how very much I have needed this.’
What form did the research take?
Discovering Prayer was able to make these discoveries thanks to funding from the Sir Halley Stewart Trust.
The aim was to search out world-class researchers and ask for advice on how to measure the impact of taking part in an online prayer course. It's been a blessing to work with Matthew T. Lee, Director of Empirical Research at the Human Flourishing Program at Harvard University. He suggested using three methods to measure changes in Challenge participants’ wellbeing and relationship with God:
After evaluating this quantitative data and qualitative feedback, Matthew T. Lee found the 14-Day Prayer Challenge to be ‘quite meaningful, even transformative’ and ‘remarkably effective’ for participants who gave feedback through one or more of these channels.
Alongside some very encouraging feedback from people who took part, this special 14-Day Prayer Challenge report shares four recommendations for organisations looking to effectively evaluate a project like this:
As you'll see, the views and data captured through the surveys, feedback and interviews were wonderfully helpful in demonstrating what a difference the series made to individuals. But close examination showed that the way this research was designed and implemented needed to be more rigorous to allow a truly scientific assessment of the Challenge's impact on people’s personal flourishing or wellbeing.
Do take a look. You’re warmly invited to download the full report on the 14-Day Prayer Challenge and share it with those you think would find these insights helpful.
After all, being willing to take risks, make mistakes and continually learn not only underpins all Discovering Prayer does but is foundational to a joyful discovery of prayer for life!
Nuns and monks have so much to teach us about prayer – but maybe not in the way you might expect.
Deepen your relationship with God through guided audio prayer times
We're grateful to the Sir Halley Stewart Trust, the Community of St Mary the Virgin, Wantage, the Community of St John Baptist and the Gladiator Trust for enabling us to create and make this valuable resource freely available for thousands of people.
